According the Des Moines Register, same sex couples married in Iowa and other states will still be effected by Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, prohibits gays and lesbians from being open and honest about their lives. They can not identify openly as gay or lesbian, and they are prohibited from engaging in same gender sexual behavior. Even a simple conversation with a brief mention of their life will subject them to involuntary discharge.  To add to that already psychologically damaging list, same sex couples who choose to protect their families through their marriage rights in Iowa, Vermont, Massachusetts, and Connecticut, will be involuntary discharged from the National Guard and other military branches.

Don’t Ask Don’t Tell is also doing a disservice to the United States Military. According to the Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, approximately 13,000 service members have been dishonorably discharged because of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. Nealry 900 were “mission critical,” such as Arab language specialists (a difficult position to fill).

According to the Williams institute (2007) 4000 people decide not to join the military annually because of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. A Blue Ribbon commission reported in 2008 that the cost of implementing Don’t Ask Don’t Tell is $363.8 Million and rising.

75% of Americans support repealing Don’t Ask Don’t Tell.  Most military missions are with coalition forces. Our allies already permit gays and lesbians to serve openly, so our military is already successfully working with openly gay and lesbian forces. 65,000 gay and lesbian military personal are in active service, risking their lives and dieing for the United States, yet we deny them the decency of recognizing who they — who they were born to be.

President Obama promised to overturn Don’t Ask Don’t Tell during the campaign, but he has yet to act on that promise. So for now, anyone who exercises their right to marry the love of their life will face a dishonorable discharge from the military.  Until this policy is overturned, anyone who supports Don’t Ask Don’t Tell is not truthful when they claim to support the troops. They can claim they support the heterosexual troops, but not all the troops — because that is the truth.

If you are on the fence about Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, let me challenge you to try to live like a gay or lesbian in the military.  For this experiment let’s pretend that Don’t Ask Don’t Tell applies to heterosexual service members. For one week do not mention your wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend. Remove all evidence of your life at home including pictures of your children, vacation photos, etc. Make sure the clothes you wear, or the way you talk , or walk do not tip anyone off to your heterosexuality.  Manage every movement, thought, and sentence that comes out of your mouth.

Do this for one week and then tell me that Don’t Ask Don’t Tell is fair to the service men and women who are risking their lives right this moment in wars throughout the world. Tell me you feel just fine, that it didn’t alter your psychological well being. If you are in the Military, tell me it is okay that your wife/husband/family should not be given any benefits if you were killed. Tell me that’s an American value.

Edit:  I changed dishonerable discharge to involuntary discharge.  I was corrected by a reader on an important legal distinction. Most gays and lesbians recieve involuntary discharges.  A court marshal is required for a dishonerable discharge.